ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize