Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize