Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
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He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize