You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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