Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
