And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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