It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
