I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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