Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
