Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
