I think I am morally bankrupt
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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