I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Enjoy the penises
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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