I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
