And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
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