RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
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