Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
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