i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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