Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
