Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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