Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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