How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
How external is "for external use only"?
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize