I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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