I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
