first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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