Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Randomize
