So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize