i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
These tits shall not be calmed
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
