what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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