all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.