Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
