Only a mothe r could love this liver
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
