You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
