The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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