We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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