Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
