It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
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