I have demons in me.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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