return my video game
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize