Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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