I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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