I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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