TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible