just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
did you just send me my own nude
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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