i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
