I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
