super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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