So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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