Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
40s are totally the cure
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
