For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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