I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
